Reentry. Cipher going back into the Matrix. But there is no Woman in the Red Dress, only a profound kind of anxiety and almost a sadness that we could feel as we stepped onto American soil again. Not because we were back in the States. Actually, we were excited about that. I am talking about everyone else here that we were interacting with. While we have certainly stayed up with American news and politics while on the road—the plane crashes, the fires, the floods, the threats of tariffs, measles, the bird flu, the threats on Medicare and Social Security, etc.—we have also managed to keep them at arm’s length. Mostly by seeing them through the eyes of the news of the countries we were in. The news makes it all feel far away. When you watch news in another country, there are no arguing pundits as there are here, only rational discussions and perspectives on what the news means to them going forward. The hosts and guests are still worried, that’s for sure, but nobody is talking over somebody else in a show of testosterone-fueled dominance like there is here. There is little fear mongering, and rarely do they discuss celebrities.

Our friend’s and family’s perspectives on events are another thing entirely. Here we feel their worry. A sort of helplessness against the onslaught. Sometimes, even their profound embarrassment. I have done my best to keep this blog free from politics and I will hold to that. What I am referring to is the dark cloud that seems to hang over the lives of the people we know and love. They don’t feel confident in the future. I suppose part of the reason we even hear about how people feel is that inevitably they imagine that we are free from it all. We will somehow avoid it in France. But that is just not the case. What happens here in the US is widely reported on everywhere we go. And in the case of France, there are similar things happening between the right and left, and that is often influenced by what is happening with our government. Same goes for Germany, Spain, Taiwan, Mexico. We live on a global scale today, all of us. This is unavoidable.

The Coast Guard escorts us on the ferry. It’s supposed to make us feel better.

In Bremerton, where we have been staying for the past week with our friends, I could hear anxiety in the voices of everyone we reconnected with. They had just seen something on the TV or their social media feeds that day that had them saying that their day was ruined. When I went to the grocery story, the people looked stressed walking up and down the aisles. Especially younger people pushing their kids and buying food. Things are expensive here. Really expensive. Much more expensive than anywhere else we have been in the last six months. We went to breakfast in Seattle and ordered the basic American breakfast of eggs, potatoes, and toast, with coffee, and after tax and tip it was $78. I almost choked. That is at least double what it is in France and probably four times what it is in Mexico or Taiwan.

But here is what else we noticed: Americans (and that means me) are spoiled for choice. There are so many options here for everything. In Poulsbo, WA, there is a supermarket called Town & Country, formerly Central Market, that is my idea of heaven. When I die, I hope I get to wonder there aimlessly for eternity looking at all of the many things they sell. The fresh fish. The prime beef. The Canadian duck. The jars of duck fat. The hundreds of kinds of jam or fresh ground peanut butter. The bins of dried fruits and nuts. The rows of wines from everywhere in the world. The nine kinds of apples. On another day we went to Pike Place Market. If you’ve ever been, you know it’s another section of heaven. DeLaurenti Food & Wine, the Italian market, is the VIP section of heaven, and they opened the red velvet rope for me. My God. From their shelves I made gorgonzola-stuffed dates wrapped in prosciutto and some chorizo lollipops, which is a spiced meat dipped in hot sugar that I laced with smoked paprika and Chinese chili powder that creates a candied shell. DeLaurenti’s also has a wall of amazing Italian wines.

It's not just the choices of food and wines (of paramount importance to me, obvs), it’s the huge cars, the cheap gas, the big houses (Even small houses here would be considered big in Europe.), the wide streets and sidewalks, the lit streets, all of the things that make America, America. In France it’s “Liberty, Equality, Fraternity" (Liberté, Égalité, Fraternité) and this is taken very seriously. It really makes everyone quite literally equal. Small cars, tiny apartments, non-grid narrow streets and alleys, everything on foot, and expensive gas. Here in the US, it is clearly much more of a competitive race while looking out for you and yours. The goal is to win. Fortunately, there are many levels of “winning” in the States and most people find their happiness. Certainly, not everyone.

Winning can also mean the depth and value of your friendships. I’d like to think those are more important than the car and house you have, and we are highly aware that have that here in the US, but we do not in France. At least not yet. So, seeing everyone in Bremerton was just the best. We stayed with our very generous friends at their wonderful house. We shared stories, made great food, drank great wines, went to the movies to see the Led Zeppelin documentary, and had a couple of dinner get togethers with the wider group of friends, but mostly just caught up for long mornings over coffee. Every cup, every dish, lovingly made by our friend who is an established artist and ceramics professor at the university. Her husband, a fire department lieutenant, and I share a passion for wine, so much of the conversation revolved around food and wine.

Imagine just choosing whatever you want when you’re having coffee or cooking

They have an almost spiritual view of the Olympic Mountains from their deck and when I stared out at their snow-covered peaks in the mornings, or at the setting sun behind them in the afternoons, or the blanket of stars above them at night, I would experience great pangs of doubt. Are we doing the right thing moving to Nice? Wouldn’t it be better to relocate to be closer to our friends? We would see them often and be part of such a wonderful community of people. Our families are in California, and they would certainly prefer us to be closer to them, as well. How do I just give this up? Most people can’t, or won’t, and for good reason. However, we didn’t make the decision lightly, and we’ve spent nearly three years preparing, and we do have solid reasons to use our remaining time and money to experience living in and seeing other parts of the world. This is a priority for us. But we aren’t immune to missing our families, friends, or our country. And being back here only amplifies the significance of what we’re doing.

The Olympic Mountains from Bremerton, WA

Fortunately, many of our friends and family will be visiting us almost immediately after we return to Nice. We’ll be traveling with our Bremerton friends to Normandy, Brittany, the Loire Valley, and then Burgundy. There might be some wine involved on that trip. My aunt and uncle are returning to Paris in May, and we’ll be meeting them for more days of Parisian gastronomic joy. Maybe some more wine there, too. Our friend and neighbor will be following them when she visits us in Nice for a week in June. Who knows if there will be wine there, or rather, I should say who knows how many bottles will be filling the recycle bin at our place? The point is, while we’ll miss seeing everyone on a more daily, weekly, or monthly basis, we will still see our loved ones often. I am more than grateful that I can have both living in France and seeing my loved ones. If you’re reading this, I encourage you to consider a visit to France. We’d love to see you. There might be wine for you, too.

Last night we flew to San Diego to see my family. We immediately went to eat Mexican food and all was right with the world again. Already the calendar is filling up with plans to see everyone. One of the benefits of traveling the world and then returning to your home country is that everyone really wants to see you. This is great for the ego, let me tell you.

Back in the USS…A, USA

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Back in the USS…A, USA

Much Needed Family Time

Bittersweet Goodbye

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